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I spend lots of time in this column and over at documenting the worst of the worst internet daters. And there are so many bad ones! But there are also some really good ones — and some mediocre ones that could be so much better if not for rookie mistakes. So, welcome to Internet Dating Bootcamp, where I'll teach you how to trick unsuspecting Match. First up: How to create a good profile. If you like low-key creative types, share what it is you make. Do you get off on witty banter? Then your profile should be clever. Want someone who shares your taste for obscure French films? Reference one of them and see who bites. No, not everyone wants to date a carbon copy of themselves, but most of us want to be with someone with some overlapping interests. Online dating is like advertising: Know your ideal audience and target them by positioning yourself to be as appealing as possible. The obvious points of picking photos are to make them 1 flattering, and 2 accurate. But the photo from 6 years, 25 pounds and two high-stress jobs ago? Yes, you looked great, but you want to date someone who is attracted to you right now. So select photos that look good, but could also in some universe be reasonably understood to be you. Relatedly: Select photos where you can actually see what you look like. Remember, the whole point of your photo is for someone to evaluate whether or not they want to sex you. This is, unsurprisingly, pretty strongly gendered: There are tons of men who are, say, 36, and list their dating age range from 20 — 35, or women who are 28 and list their dating age range from 29 — 44. My point is, check yourself. And also realize that while relationships with large age differences can of course be happy and successful, there is usually something wrong with a person who refuses to engage romantically with anyone in their peer group, and instead seeks out a relationship that will involve serious differences in experience and power. But only one of those things should be listed on your internet dating profile. The A n nals of Online Dating is a weekly column about How We Date Now, from the proprietor of , showing off the best of the worst internet dating has to offer.
